Friday, July 29, 2011

My everyday morning...

Ever wonder what it's like to be a stay at home mom (SAHM) of two little boys?  Wonder no more.  It's been a rather pleasant morning in our household so I thought I might share it with you.

5:18   Wake up to Hudson's hungry cry.  Feed Hudson.  Try unsuccessfully to get him back to sleep.
5:40   Put Hudson back in his crib and pray he doesn't wake Danner.
6:30   I kind of remember Danner crying and maybe cuddling with my husband and both of them getting         up at some point.  Then I laid in a comatose like state for another 1/2 hr thinking I really should get up and make my husband breakfast...
7:00  Danner had to eat the rest of his dinner from the night before so he was grumpy.  Hudson was awake again and quite happy.   My husband made his own breakfast and looked like two lively kiddos and a half-asleep wife was not his idea of an ideal morning.
8:00  Breakfast was finished, Hudson was fed again and went down for a morning snooze.  Kitchen was cleaned up.  Cloth diapers thrown in the washer. Then Danner and I built a pretty sweet train track in the living room.
9:00  I was informed that I was playing trains wrong by a very upset (almost) 3 yr old.  That concluded the game of trains.  We then ate 1/2 a cantaloupe and I vegged out on the internet for the next 1/2 hr while Danner entertained himself.
10:00  Ventured outside to water the flowers, weed the garden and flowerbeds, and rip out morning glory from my raspberry bushes/vines/stalks/whatever you call them.  The last activity involved a lot of silent cursing.  Danner helped me weed.  My sunflowers and spinach both suffered some irreparable damage.  As an excuse to get Danner away from the rest of my poor veggies I turned on the sprinkler and called it a day for gardening.
10:45  Danner did a few laps around the yard in his tractor.  I was the motor.
10:50  Danner informed me it was lunch time and he was hungry.  I informed him that lunch does not happen before 11.  After considerable negotiations we agreed blueberry yogurt was a acceptable snack.
11:00  Back to the train.  Hudson woke up and was fed/changed/dressed.  Diapers hung out to dry.
11:30   Lunchtime!    At which Danner looked at me and said, "mommy, do you need a cup of coffee?"  in which I responded "no." and He said, "mommy, it's no, thank you." 

So Ta-da.  There you have it.  A pretty normal morning in the Hodge household.  Minus about 2 more diaper changes and bouts of whining & crying.

Have a wonderful day!

Tuesday, July 19, 2011

Part 2

NEVER threaten, say or even think divorce.

Don't let it be an option.  It's as simple as that.

Because the truth is divorce is ugly.  It's painful and awful and will have lifelong consequences.  And no matter what anyone says, it is not better for the kids.  Don't believe me, then check out the statistics on these web sites:

Just to name a few, children from divorced homes (which happen to be 1/2 the kids in North America) are much more likely to get poor grades, have bad health & serious emotional problems, go to prison, commit suicide, have failed marriages, etc.  And amazingly enough, children from divorced homes have more psychological problems then children from homes in which one parent has died.

And that's just talking about the kids.  In one study on loneliness (defined as 'absence of satisfying social relationships') those who were married were by far the lowest % with 4.6.  Never married was next at over 14% and those who were divorced, widowed or separated were all over 20%.

So please, don't ever think of divorce as a quick fix or a way to start with a 'clean slate'.  It's not and will never be.

Instead, think of marriage as a gift.  An opportunity to learn and mature and grow up and stop being so darn selfish!  There, I said it.  That's the bottom line.  Sometimes you just need to give yourself a good kick in the bum and realize, it's not about me!  (gasp, NOOOOOO!)  And then have a good cry, eat a tub of chocolate ice cream with delicious caramel fudge swirls, and get over it.   (And, if you're a slow learner like me, this may need to be repeated every few years)

So there you go.  That's my take on marriage.
If yours is broken, start repairing it.
If it's okay, make it better.
If it's great, maintain the greatness.
If it's perfect, just wait til you get home from your honeymoon;)

Fight for your marriage.  Fight for the marriages of your friends.


*The above article is not meant to address marital situations involving abuse or danger.  If you are being threatened or abused by your spouse please seek immediate help from a profession.

Monday, July 11, 2011

Be Pro-Marriage! Part-1

As I'm sure you'll soon discover, I am a very passionate person.  At least, I'm a very passionate person when it comes to specific subjects.

One of those subjects is marriage.  There are few things that break my heart like the 'I'm committed 'til bored, things get hard, kids change things or fall out of love'  marriage that seems to plague our modern day society.  Our nations attitude towards marriage is down right scary!  It is so often portrayed as a lifelong prison sentence for men, an old-fashioned custom, or, most scary, a temporary commitment.  With that attitude, it's no wonder so many people give up on marriage.

I'll be the first to admit, marriage is not what I expected.  It's not always a lovey-dovey, hand held walks on a sunset beach, fireworks in my soul, stars in my eyes situation.  In fact, after 4 years of marriage it is rarely those things.  And thank goodness!  I'd hate to be perpetually stuck in that honeymoon state!   I mean, really, nothing would ever get done and no one could stand being around us.  (Apologizes to any newlyweds who may be offended.  I promise in a few years and a few kids you'll get over it.)

That kind of infatuation is just a starting place.  One that is fun to revisit, but oh so important to improve upon.  Because beyond that stage is an incredible opportunity to learn to really love someone.  And by love someone, I mean Corinthians 13 love someone.  In a patient, kind, non-envious, non-boastful, selfless, forgiving kind of way.  In the way that love is meant to be.

It's not easy.  Actually, some days, and even some years, it's down right hard and it involves a whole lot of work.  And there's absolutely no way to truly love your spouse unless you are willing to sacrifice your own wants, desires and even dreams for their good.  I'm not saying you have to give up on all those things or even throw them by the wayside.  I'm just saying that you have to be willing to if your spouse needs you to.  Because when you die to self and start living for others, wow, that's really living!

It's a process.  Marriage, loving, living, growing.  When two people get married they're like two different stones with a whole lot of rough edges.  Marriage is going to make those stones rub together a whole lot.  And the way you rub your spouse is going to determine whether it makes them even sharper and harder or softer and coordinating.

So just take one small step in the right direction.  And then another and another.  Even if you're the only one walking, keep taking those steps.  You'll be amazed at how far it takes you. be continued.

Thursday, July 7, 2011

The Introduction

This is me:

(Before children and an extra 20 lbs)

I am happily married to this man:
I mean, really, who wouldn't be happy being married to such a handsome, useful guy.
By the way, his name is Shelby.

And these are our two kids:
Danner would be the one 'hugging' his younger brother, Hudson.
He either loves him a lot or is trying to squeeze the life out of him.
Definitely debatable.

   I've been meaning to start a blog for a long time.  Mainly because I love to write, to encourage and to make people laugh.  I've technically had this blog for about 6 months.  At least, that's when I created it.  But then I couldn't find the perfect layout or background picture which was so frustrating I had to ignore it for a long time.  I still don't have the perfect design, but the 'itch' to write has been bugging me so much that I finally conceded to let it be.

   In the near future you can expect a variety of posts full of DIY projects (which will take you less then a 1/2 hr since that's my attention span for such projects); gardening tips (primarily on what not to do); entertaining, yet not too embarrassing, stories of my children; thoughts on parenting, marriage and probably 10 million other things.

   So bookmark this page, check on it now and again, and hopefully you can come away from it feeling encouraged and blessed.  Or, at the least, thanking God you're not as crazy, impatient and scatterbrained as that Blossom blogger.